How Will You Be Remembered?

This is the complied list I had asked for on September 21, shortly after my beloved's passing, about what one word would you use to describe and remember Amy Krambeck Campbell. It is absolutely incredible how many lives one person could touch in such a short period of time, many of which she did from the couch or bed of our home. I would not say that she necessarily did it in comfort, but I would without a shadow of a doubt say she did it with the utmost and deepest love of all, Agape love. Agape love is a love that is only obtainable by a deep and meaningful relationship with God the Father, Christ Jesus the Son, and the Holy Spirit. It is full dependence and reliance upon His Spirit and strength that allows one to see and love as Amy did.

So after reading this post, my prayer is that you will take a moment and examine your life, your heart, the way you live. However, do not use your feelings or understanding or standards, but God's. Let Him show you his Agape love. Let Him give you a peace that surpasses all understanding, and above all, let Him give you His grace. His grace to forgive the things that really don't matter in this life, His grace to become reconciled to Him and to those you love. His grace to love the life He gives you each day, and to live it to your fullest potential, and for His glory.

Today is that day to make these changes, and begin by asking yourself, when your time comes, how will you be remembered? I miss you and love you for eternity baby!!!

Psalm 118:24 - This is the day the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it!!

September 21st, 2010 - One of the first posts I made on FaceBook after Amy's passing

I am looking for EVERYONE'S input on one word that they feel described Amy Krambeck Campbell for I am just learning from many of you and have a bunch of new friends. Please reply back with your name and your word as this is going in her memorial book for me (us). Thank you all so very much for allowing her (us) to be a part of your lives!!!

Shawn Campbell -  The word I used to describe my wife - AMAZING!!!!

Rebecca Gill -  Compassionate!!

Susan Schotsch Warburton - determined

Mandy Ray Jones - bold

Juan Camargo - One word? Geeze.... that's kinda hard. Love

Dorothy Gibson (Aunt Dorothy) - Godly

Luella Long Lu - dedicated

Shelly Harmon Beebe - Glee :-)

Ben Stallman - devoted

Darren Reames - one word things are hard.. there's LIFE, there's Godly, there's friend... but I'll go with Rebecca, COMPASSIONATE about those she loved and called friends and also about the things she cared about

Lauren Ashley Lauren- Loving :)

Becky Molloy - Saint

Brooke Freeman Pettigrew - determined and warm (i know that's two, sorry.)

Ericka Luidhardt - Life

Rafe Spraker - My "Sola" Friend

Rik Gracia - Gentle

Nikki Galagher - caring

Shane Black Infoulable-preppy

Jessica Jones Stallman -  BEST-friend. It's 2 words but I can't just say friend. She was my BEST friend. So when you write it, throw in a hyphen or sumpin... Love you bruh

Leah Hatmaker - Beautiful there are so many words

Lynnie Keith-Wenneson - angel dove, such a beautiful spirit and always putting others first

Beth Delaney -  Inspirational! Accepting! Compassionate! (I could keep going here, but I'm sure that I've exceeded my one word to describe Amy limit!)

Connie Stallings - Amy and i went to elementary school together she was the most "selfless" person I have ever known.

Fran Scarborough - Honest...

Dream a dream

This poem is a piece one of my cousins in Wisconsin (who is more like a big sister really) wrote to bring me peace and comfort shortly after Amy's passing.

Dream a dream of hearts combined
of one with wings that’s so divine.
Dream a dream of love so right ,
of one that waits in heavens light.
Dream of dreams of days gone by,
remembering each tear you cry.
Dream dreams of the one you love,
for it is sent to heaven above.

My cousin had only met Amy one time, but this poem was so fitting for Amy. Amy dared to dream a dream, that some day true love she would find. Her heart desired love like that of the Victorian era. Amy also dreamed the dreams of love that some of which became reality in our marriage. I will say this, as I have before, and will some day again. I took that for granted, like one or both of us was promised a tomorrow, and missed fulfilling many other dreams. Please, take the time in this life while you can, to make amends, to find the true love that you dream a dream of, then thank God for your life and allowing Amy to be a part of your dreams of divine love. I miss you my angel baby!!!

A Day in the Life of Amy (and other IH patients)

This is one of my favorite pictures of Amy. It says A LOT about her really. 1) This picture was taken at one of her favorite places, Oakland's Mansion in Murfreesboro, TN. 2) Amy loved black and white photographs. 3) This was one of Amy's favorite trees, she has even taken pictures of our girls in the same place. 4) Most importantly, this is one of the few time I have seen Amy at such peace. It is not that I do not appreciate all of the other pictures of her as she is the most beautiful woman I have EVER met, had a million dollar smile, eyes that pierced your very soul when she spoke to and of you, I could go on and on. This is how I would picture Amy right now, resting in peace up in heaven, anxiously awaiting for the rest of the saints to be reunited, and smiling down on the lives that she touched and see the seeds that she planted in our hearts bloom.

I do not mean any disrespect in any way to anyone, but I would like to take a moment to share a private and intimate piece of Amy's life. Many of the current followers of her blog are or may be care givers of Intra-Cranial Hypertension (IH) patients, but there are some who are not. So this morning will be just a small glimpse of what her days were like. I am not going to post it exactly day by day, but just give you an idea of what Amy and others with IH go through daily. Again, I apologize if I have offended anyone, but Amy did not want people to worry about her so much, and did not want special treatment or pity because of this horrible illness. Please continue to pray for those who continue to fight this illness, and there is a non-profit organization that continues research for IH - IH Foundation Your contributions are tax deductible, and if you so choose, you can also give in memory of Amy and they will send you a card back as a keepsake if you wish. Blessings on your day, and baby, I am sorry if your didn't want people to know, but it helps us understand you and this illness better. I do it in respect, love, and I miss you dearly!!!

A piece from Amy's diary 2009 -

I have been waking up many times during the night for the past few days and having to clean the fluid (excess spinal fluid pushing out her ears due to high head pressure). My head throbs and I get dizzy. I stay tired because I cannot get a good nights sleep. A couple of days after this, it was a difficult night because I woke up in pain from a kidney stone that is sometimes the side effect of taking topamax. The following month I caught the flu which is not good, as I cannot take many of the medications that others can take to get rid of it due to my IH or blood clotting disorder. There is also a risk that if the infection spreads, it could infect any part of my shunt, which would mean another surgery. (Praise God that did not happen!!!)

This is just a small part of her daily routine, and others who face IH. Again, I am writing this from the point of educating others and praying for a cure from this dreaded illness. I was blessed to be a part of Amy's life and to be her caregiver, I know that we were both frustrated many times because of the illness, but we loved each other like no other. I miss you baby!!!

I'm Fine.....

I'm fine... One of my favorite short quotes from one of Amy's (and mine) top 10 movies. The truth is that I am not fine really, but doing as well as can be expected at this point. Watching Elizabethtown is actually quite therapeutic, for anyone really. At Amy's funeral I asked everyone to think for a moment of one word that described Amy (of course this is very difficult task), and I used the word amazing. Amy was also a very picturesque person. She loved to take photographs of lots of different subjects and then usually put them in scrapbooks to some of her favorite poetry, some of which she originally wrote. That is how she would remember the parts of her life, and that is why the movie Elizabethtown relates so much to her life.

I also say this with the utmost respect, but Amy too would always say "I'm fine" when she really was not, so it was difficult at times to find out really what her condition was. Amy was always concerned about her other friends that had similar conditions to her's and would pray with them and offer words of encouragement or advise, especially to those who were starting to go through the multiple surgery stage and becoming frustrated. God blessed Amy with words and grace in this area beyond measure. Amy used to cry herself to sleep sometimes asking "God, why do I have to keep doing this?" and she realized that there were those who needed her. Amy planted "seeds" in others, trained them if you will, on how to be encouraging, tough, and to not let IH beat her or anyone else. IH did not beat my girl, but an untimely blood clot did, and to that you never know when that can happen, especially when you have a blood clotting disorder.

Amy wanted to meet my family in Wisconsin, and last year we had the opportunity to go. It was absolutely miserable for Amy (the drive that is), but she was such a trooper. As if that was not bad enough, she went to two of my favorite places to be back home, Granddad's Bluff, and up to my cousins along the river. She had bad headaches the whole time, and rested a lot, but it was important to her that we make that trip and that she meet my family. On the way there and on the way back, Amy even took pictures of the actual Elizabethtown interstate signs and that made her happy (except my driving, sorry again baby). 

So if you want to see how Amy coped at times and viewed life, buy (which I HIGHLY recommend) or rent Elizabethtown and have a date night, have friends over to celebrate life, and remember Amy each time. If you want an added extra bonus, Amy said (which we did) you have to watch it with closed captioning turned on. I cannot tell you why, you just have to do it and see. Also a warning here, there are a few pieces of language in here, but not too rough, and I think the F word is used once, so beware not to have the little ones around. God bless, and I miss you more and more each day baby. Some day soon the saints will see you again in all your radiant glory and no more pressure or pain.

The World's Most Beautiful

Remember that song way back when... "Hey, have you happened to see the most beautiful girl in the world?" That song was written by Charlie Rich 6 years before Amy was even born, how could he have known? That was Amy, B-E-A-U-T-I-F-U-L!!! both inside and out, and I always told her that. I have never seen or known a person with such a heart or passion, who loved so many people across so many different ministries. Today is another one of the first poems I sent to her in the early days. Enjoy, and God bless. I miss you baby!!

The World's Most Beautiful

I'd give anything to see the sun set on the horizon,
I'd do anything to gaze at a full moon in the night sky;
Even a rainbow would make me smile,
And I'd love to swim in crystal clear waters
Of an untouched sea;
Sometimes I'll see a shooting star,
And try to gaze from afar,
All the diamonds in the night sky;
The mist on the mountains is breathtaking,
As is walking in rainforest;
To see cascading waterfalls I'd do anything for,
As to stand on the highest peak in the world,
And look at the sights below;
I'd love to soar on wings above the clouds,
Across the bluest skies;
I'd do anything to see
All the beautiful things in the world,
Like a red rose blooming in the Sahara,
Like a river twisting through a dusty land,
All the beautiful things in the world;

But I also know I am looking at
The world's most beautiful creation,
Every time you smile,
And every time I look into your eyes.

- Muhammad Edwan Shaharir - 

Then There's That Moment When...

Have you ever had that moment when you felt like the bug that hits the windshield or the deer in the headlights at the last moment, well that's how I feel today. The impact has finally started and I am just being honest. This blog is about Amy, but it is also about us (her, me, her family, everything that she meant to everyone). Please continue to lift up our families in prayer as many are just now starting to feel the impact as have I. God bless

If There's...

If there's one face I want to see,
so beautiful, so true,
one smile that makes a difference,
to everything I do.

If there's one touch I long to feel,
one voice I long to hear,
whenever I am happy,
or just needing someone near.

If there's one joy, one love,
from which I never want to part,
it's you, my very special love,
my world, my life, my heart.

Amy's Dove Chocolates Saying of the Day - 10/5/10

Houston, we have a problem!!! There will only be two chocolate sayings for the day instead of three, we have officially ran out of Dove chocolates (I know, OH NOOOO!!). I guess she will just have to settle for a BIG kiss from her DOC :o)

I am not sure if I will continue down this playful path with my baby, or if I shall switch to poetry and some of her favorite pieces of scriptures and other readings. Either way, please be sure to stop by frequently to help keep her memory alive. If someone else would like to share some stories, please feel free to get in touch with me. This is a place for all of us to share my baby, the love of my life, and to get each other through this necessary process of grieving so we can be healed by the Amazing Grace of God.

Amy's Dove Chocolates Saying of the Day - 10/5/10

1) How perfect a day can be when you think positively
2) Embrace change it may be a blessing in disguise

In the beginning - The days we fell in love

As I look back to the beginning to escape the end, I continually go over each day I had with you in my mind. I remember saying the vows "For better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, until death do you part." You held up your end of the vows, and for that I am so grateful. There are not many marriages that make it these days, and we had our fair share of testing and refining fire on our blessed union. It was such an honor and privilege to be a part of your life as your husband, and I just wish I was not so foolish as to not have the heart that you had. You had a wonderful and beautiful heart, and I was scared to let you have all of mine.

Even though the reality of you not being her physically each day, my love continues to grow for you more and more each day. I know this is only temporary, and it is not good-bye, but see you soon. Not sure if they have bass players in heaven, but when you see Peter B. please tell him I am still not playing with my pinky finger :o)

Some of these poems were love poems that I had found when we first starting dating and made Amy gush with joy and happiness knowing that someone loved her the way she wanted to be. The freaky thing is they are dated in her emails that I found almost to the day from a few years back. I wish we all had more time with her, but we can if we all share our memories and stories we knew about her, and yours about from her eyes to me, and other growing up stories. Enjoy, and I miss you baby, more and more each day. LOTS of love - DOC - xoxoxoxoxo

Your Amazing

That day  I saw you standing there
i couldn't help but sit and stare
I didn't think we'd come this far
it was like you were sent from a shining star
iI didn't think love could feel so good
it feels safe and warm just like it should
the hurt and pain I thought would last
is thanks to you now all in the past
the way you hold me the way it feels
is just so strong and just so real
I know you love me and i love you too
and i hope were together all the way through
so i just wanted to say....
baby your amazing!!

Amy's Dove Chocolates Saying of the Day - 10/4/10

Well, on top of everything else going on, it was a cold dark dreary day. Like I said a week ago, why do days of death appear this way. Along with the cold day came a cold DOC (as Amy referred to and nick named me short for a computer doc or repairer). So not a whole lot of thought (or sleep for that matter) behind the writing today. Then again, there are probably a few of you who are thankful for that.

God bless you on your day and the gift of life that His grace has given you this day.

Amy's Dove Chocolates Saying of the Day - 10/4/10



1) Dream BIG, remember, dreams do come true.
2) Indulge in the moments that matter most
3) Look for love in unexpected places

I would dare say that these three today summed up Amy's and my life most of the times we had together. I know these are things that she searched for in all of her friends and family, and especially me. There was not a day that went by that she didn't tell me how much she loved me, appreciated me, was thankful that God brought us together in trying circumstances. She especially loved hearing me call her Mrs. Amy Krambeck Campbell, and to me, that is who she will always be. I love you baby!!!

If You Only Knew - My first love poem to Amy when we first started dating

The picture above was one of our first pictures together, and I took it myself (not a bad job, eh.) It is in Cannonsburgh Village, a place that was part of yesteryear's history, and of course Amy loves history. They have a little school house down there, and some other buildings from that era. This is also one of the last dates that I had the privilege of going with both my lovely wife, and our children shortly before going through all the surgeries.

The poem that follows is one of the first love poems that I wrote for Amy when we first started dating. I do not know too many people who are REALLY sentimental, but the things that were important to Amy, she treated them VERY special, as they were her treasures this side of heaven. She truly cherished the time we had together and saved many of the special moments between us. It was a honor to be her husband and a father figure to our children. I miss you baby!!!

If You Only Knew

If you only knew what I dreamt in the past

I always searched for a love that would last

I knew the soul for it seared my heart

A love so strong it could never break apart

If you only knew how many tears I cried

Yearning for that soul to be by my side

Days would pass and love was lost

But I would be happy someday no matter the cost

Then out of the blue it was revealed to me

My true love that was meant to be

I was scared at first but now I see

An angel of love just for me

At first I denied it because it could not be true

But when my heart started burning it was then I knew

The dream became a reality, the vision quite clear

I now had someone to share love with and no more fear

Now as I think about you each and every day

I hear every word you have whispered to my heart

The word I love you we will never break apart

In my dreams that is what you promised from the start

I still dream, that I do

But not about someone to love me someday

Because that dream has come true

Now I dream of an eternity of happiness with you

Poetic Sunday to my Beloved - To My God and to My Wife

Some time ago, I purchased a wonderful book of prayers called The Valley of Vision, and the prayers are written by Puritans from some years ago. I was sharing them on some of my FaceBook posts a few months ago and found what I believe to be fitting to my lovely wife and honoring her and our Heavenly Father this day.  I pray that this day finds you blessed, and remember Amy in your hearts. She planted many seeds of faith in all of us, and the seeds belong to God, but I cannot help but picture her watering the seeds with her tears of joy for her God, her family, and her friends.

Grace & peace...

Christ Alone

O God,
Thy main plan, and the end of thy will
is to make Christ glorious and beloved in heaven
Where He is now ascended
Where one day all the elect will behold His glory
and love and glorify Him forever

Though here I love Him but little
may this be my portion at last
In this world thou hast given me a beginning
one day it will be perfected in the realm above

Thou hast helped me to see and know Christ
though obscurely
to take Him, receive Him
to possess Him, love Him
to bless Him in my heart, mouth, life

Let me study and stand for discipline
and all the ways of worship
out of love for Christ
and to show my thankfulness
to seek and know His will from love
to hold it in love
and daily to care for and keep this state of heart

Thou hast led me to place all my nature
and happiness
in oneness with Christ
in having heart and mind centered only on Him
in being like Him in communicating good to others

This is my heaven on earth
but I need the force, energy, impulses of thy Spirit
to carry me on the way to my Jerusalem

Here, it is my duty
to be as Christ in this world
to do what He would do
to live as He would live
to walk in love and meekness
then would He be known
then I would have peace in death.

Amy's Dove Chocolates Saying of the Day - 10/2/10

Yeah, right now my days are beginning to become what the old addage says "A dollar short, and a day late." There is still much work to do, and yet I do not seem to know where to begin. Many times when I begin something, I suddenly have to stop as I find out something new or an old memory comes back, and I have to take a moment to cry and catch my breath.

My mind is still reeling much of the time trying to grasp how much Amy truly loved me, respected me, and cared for me as a husband. I never knew that is what true love felt like until she was gone. Now I am left with the memory of why death has to be the reminder of what the goal of living life truly is. Please take a moment today, for no one is promised a tomorrow, and do as our Pastor encouraged at the funeral, tell your stories.

Tell the stories of what Amy was to you, tell the ones you love and are your soul mates a story about how you first met, how much you appreciate them, etc. If anything, please do it for Amy, because that is how she lived, and never wasted a moment to tell me and our girls, how much she LOVED us!! I am so grateful to experience a once in a lifetime marriage that was blessed beyond measure by the richest graces of our Father in heaven. Glory be to Him for all that she did with her life, and may that same glory guide us in our journey's of love. God bless

Amy's Dove Chocolates Saying of the Day


1 ) Shoe shopping is therapy
2) Create a little controversy
3) Dance your heart out as if nobody is watching!

I miss you baby!!! Or as you always loved to hear Mrs. Campbell :o)

Life Is But a Weaver - by Corrie Ten Boom

Amy loved the era of the holocaust for a few different reasons. Probably the main reason is her love for History, but I would also add for her love for God. As tragic as the holocaust was, God was there, there were hero's, and God's Sovereignty is where it has always been, in His hands.

We all go through trials in life, some may not appears as bad as to others, and some so bad, they wonder, why me. Amy used to think that about her health, and ask why me? Then she would also see the horrifying pictures and movies about the holocaust and remember, there are those who have gone through far worse things than what she has. God did not have to provide her with what I would consider the best doctors in their field. I (we) have heard what some of her other IH friends go through on a daily basis, and that is their doctors telling them it is all in their heads (no pun intended) and do not believe IH exists. Amy could (and should have died) when first diagnosed as they found 12 calcified blood clots in her brain when she went through a stroke. She has been through grand mal seizures, and many other issues.

However, Amy would find the strength in her God, she would seek the shadows of His wings, and would find a peace that would surpass all understanding. That is how she was able to get through what she did, and help and bless those that she did. That is why she always wore her faith proudly on her sleeve, and shared it with everyone.

Amy also liked some of Corrie Ten Booms writings, and appreciated the ministry that God gave Corrie in helping to hide the Jews from persecution and death. So I felt that Amy would enjoy this poem today, and a part of it was also sent to me by a very dear friend. Thank you all for the encouragement and love each and every day, and allowing me (us) to keep her memories and sharing her life alive. God bless

Life is But a Weaving

My life is but a weaving
Between my God and me.
I cannot choose the colors
He weaveth steadily.

Oft’ times He weaveth sorrow;
And I in foolish pride
Forget He sees the upper
And I the underside.

Not ‘til the loom is silent
And the shuttles cease to fly
Will God unroll the canvas
And reveal the reason why.

The dark threads are as needful
In the weaver’s skillful hand
As the threads of gold and silver
In the pattern He has planned

He knows, He loves, He cares;
Nothing this truth can dim.
He gives the very best to those
Who leave the choice to Him.

Because I Could Not Stop For Death - Emily Dickinson

Because I could not stop for Death,
He kindly stopped for me;
The carriage held but just ourselves
And Immortality.

We slowly drove, he knew no haste,
And I had put away
My labor, and my leisure too,
For his civility.

We passed the school, where children strove
At recess, in the ring;
We passed the fields of gazing grain,
We passed the setting sun.

Or rather, he passed us;
The dews grew quivering and chill,
For only gossamer my gown,
My tippet only tulle.

We paused before a house that seemed
A swelling of the ground;
The roof was scarcely visible,
The cornice but a mound.

Since then 'tis centuries, and yet each
Feels shorter than the day
I first surmised the horses' heads
Were toward eternity.

Amy's Dove Chocolates Saying of the Day - 10/1/10

I have yet to decide if I have completely lost my mind as of yet. I know that through all of this people have been more than encouraging in the Words and comfort of God. Many times I feel as if I have been ministered by angels (in my opinion since I have not actually known an angel), but nonetheless, many have been able to comfort and bring through many tough times during the course of these past two weeks.

Again, the enemy has been trying to attack me and bring back vivid images of September 18th. The girls will be with their dad this weekend (as the were at her time of death) and I really do not feel like being here, especially alone. I have caught myself many times longer for one more touch, one more kiss, one more touch of her hair. They say it is better to have loved and lost than not to love at all. I used to agree with that statement until I married my soul mate. The lost part is just too painful, and thank you for your continued prayers.



Amy's Dove Chocolates Saying of the Day

1) Choose that gorgeous lipgloss!!! (that one was definitely not meant for me)
2) Be the silver lining in another's cloud
3) Enjoy this moment!!! (thanks baby!!! I (we) are the best we can)

I miss you baby, and love you like no other for eternity.

I Never Saw a Moor - By Emily Dickinson - One of Amy Campbell's favorites

Many of you who knew Amy, knew she had an strong passion for life and for love for all people. Amy however was also a hopeless romantic. Not the type that wished one day that prince charming would wake her with a sweet kiss, live in a castle, happily ever after. No, Amy was classy, an aged classics kind of woman, who loved poetry as one of her many other hobbies in life.

The following poem, I Never Saw a Moor by Emily Dickinson was one of her favorites and is in her scrapbook. It is a beautiful piece just like Amy. I hope you enjoy it as much as I, and see, feel, and remember the example of passion that Amy shared with us all. God bless.

I never saw a moor,

I never saw the sea;

Yet know I how the heather looks,

And what a wave must be.

I never spoke with God,

Nor visited in heaven;

Yet certain am I of the spot

As if the chart were given.

Latest video for Amy - Carrie Underwood In Your Heaven

Another tribute to a fine woman and wife, my best friend and soul mate, Amy D. Campbell. May she be enjoying everything God ever promised her and all that she ever dreamed of in heaven. I miss you baby, and love you forever and eternity.

Amy's Dove Chocolates Saying of the Day

Now I (we, our family) are not the kind of people that believe in witchcraft, the occult, mediums, etc. but, this whole Dove chocolate thing is getting a little freaky (but in a fun good way). It is almost like Amy reminding me of things of how she felt about me as a husband, and the others she interacted with on a daily basis. It is also therapeutic, as it brings joy to my heart (plus yummy chocolate to my tummy), and hopefully brings a smile to y'all's faces. Sure, we are all still going through a difficult valley, but Amy would be one of the first to tell us there is no valley too deep that Christ cannot get us out of, and even when just one sheep is hurting, He will be there for them in all things. I know (and there are many others) am that hurt sheep. If it was not for my wonderful family (GCA our home church, Amy's relatives, my relatives, our friends) I would be locked up for good by now. So I close before the sayings, thank you ALL so much again for your extended grace, love, hospitality, generosity, faith, prayers, and encouragement. There is still a long road to travel, but the leader has not changed, so it is on Christ the solid Rock we stand.

Grace & peace...

Shawn

1) Believe in love at first sight, just in case!!! (that was Amy with me ALL the way :o)
2) Say "I love you" every day to your loved ones (We are both telling y'all that again)
3) Love yourself. Dare to dream. Live on purpose! (again, another motto I saw Amy live)

By the way, when I am writing these out, I am also writing them in the order that I opened and ate them. That is what makes it even more weird.

Thanks again for allowing me the privilege our sharing my beloved Baby with all of you. That is how she lived her on earth, and that is the way she will remain in our hearts :o) 
 

My Murfreesboro - By Amy D Campbell

The following poem was written a few years ago about Murfreesboro TN, the city in which we live. Amy (on top of everything else) was a historical fanatic and obsessed (in a great way) with these types of things. She once told me, if she would have been able to, she would have gone to school to become a historical preservationist. Please enjoy the beauty, the life, and the love of my beloved soul mate, Amy D. Campbell.  God Bless

My Murfreesboro

Here's to the town that I so love,
Whose style will never cease,
Who keeps my heart in their lovely homes
Down oak and elm lined streets

So rich in history, she is,
Oh, I can just imagine
Louisianna Collier's face
As she gazed on her grand new mansion

And Adeline Maney relaxing on
A porch where breezes blow
And carry with them wings of cotton
and the scents of Main Street's stores

How I'll look back with tears and smiles
When I think of all the times
I daydreamed and I gathered shells
at Stone's River's sides.

Oh, place of beauty, place of faith,
May God always hold you dear
I'll look on you with sentiment

And water your earth with my tears

Amy's Dove Chocolates Saying of the Day

I had forgotten to eat (and post) the three dove chocolate sayings of the day yesterday, so I did it first thing this morning.

I always find it quite interesting and humorous on what I get when I open each one and taste the savory taste of Dove chocolates that she so loved. So without further ado...

1) Build a bridge and get over it
2) Look for love in unexpected places
3) It's OK not to do it all

I know that you might find this weird in a sort of way, but hey, it is fun thinking of her this way and helping me cope :o)

Grace & peace...

Somewhere I Have Never Travelled, Gladly Beyond - E.E. Cummings

This poem and author (E.E. Cummings) was one of Amy's favorites
and this was forwarded to me by one of Amy's best friends, Aliesha.
Thank you for reminding us, and sharing with us such a wonderful
memory of Amy. 

Somewhere I have never traveled, gladly beyond
any experience,your eyes have their silence:
In your most frail gesture are things which enclose me,
or which I cannot touch because they are too near

Your slightest look will easily unclose me
though I have closed myself as fingers,
You open always petal by petal myself as Spring opens
(touching skilfully, mysteriously)her first rose

Or if your wish be to close me, I and
my life will shut very beautifully, suddenly,
as when the heart of this flower imagines
the snow carefully everywhere descending;
nothing which we are to perceive in this world equals
the power of your intense fragility: whose texture
compels me with the color of its countries,
rendering death and forever with each breathing

(I do not know what it is about you that closes
and opens;only something in me understands
the voice of your eyes is deeper than all roses)

Nobody, not even the rain, has such small hands

Drawing a blank - at a loss for words

Let us consider the way in which we spend our lives.

This world is a place of business. What an infinite bustle! I am awaked almost every night by the panting of the locomotive. It interrupts my dreams. There is no sabbath. It would be glorious to see mankind at leisure for once. - Henry David Thoreau

I must admit that exhaustion has set it and things have become sluggish. I need to take time to regather my thoughts and memories. Time spent on taking care of the necessities and loose ends was more than I cared to do.

One thought I did have though as I continued to go through all of her stuff (which really is only the beginning) is how did I get so busy in life to let her's slip through mine? Where did the days of blessing and love go? I must admit that I am ashamed that I was too busy working, and too burned out on life to enjoy the finer things that God had graciously blessed me with. I worked hard to provide finances for our family, yet Amy worked harder to provide our family a home.


Amy was always busy with home maker things, which to me is a rarity these days. She would home school the girls, sew baby pillows for those who were expecting, make clothes for her and the girls, just home maker stuff. These are the only fond memories that come from a deep pool of such, and yet I have hardly drawn from it. I am now feeling like I have been cheated by her going home too soon. I appreciated all that she has done for my life and that of our girls, and am even appreciating some of them more now, only wishing she were still here, but healthy, to enjoy them with me.

Yet, to God be the glory, for He needed her for a purpose far more than I, and I too some day will be with them both.

In the beginning

This is not about the very beginning, but the beginning as husband and wife.

I was going through some of our things last night and came across a WONDERFUL and romantic book (you know Amy), called Captivating Couples - celebrating love on the silver screen. An awesome wedding present along with an AWESOME scrapbook.

Here is in Amy's words, our first day as husband and wife.

To my most precious husband Shawn on our wedding day;

You are the blessing that I have always been waiting for. I praise God for bringing you into my life, for all the beauty and goodness you have shown me, and for the many promises before us. I swear to always honor, cherish, and adore you. I will love you for eternity!!! May the Lord bless us, keep us, make His face shine upon us, and be gracious unto us.

I love you (with a heart drawn around it).

Amy D. Campbell

Many of us experience the providence of God and take it for granted each day. I am ashamed to say, but I know I did. Amy was a once in a hundred lifetimes type of woman, and ANY man who was lucky enough to have her as a wife would have been blessed beyond measure. I know I was, and as selfish as it may seem, I keep wanting one more day, and I know that she would do it for her family, because she has wrestled with God for four years to give us; her family, her friends, and her support groups all that she had, by and through the grace of God.

I miss you baby, Mrs. Amy D. Campbell (she was so proud to be called that, and when I did, her face lit up like a little kid!!!) See you soon :o)

It's all about Dove - Chocolates that is :o)

The other day I broke down and purchased some Dove chocolates while at the grocery store. Dove chocolates were one of Amy's favorites (but one of her nicknames was a coincidence). Anyway, for those of you who have not have Dove chocolates before (thanks for getting me hooked baby ;o) they have little sayings inside the wrappers. So I took three chocolates at random, and hope for some laughs while writing about Amy. These are the following three wrappers that came out.

1) Every woman is a super (role) model.
2) Live life for the experiences, not the posessions
3) When you give with joy, joy is your reward

Thanks for the laughs and the memories baby!!! I miss you so.

Love,

Doc

Why is it?

Why is it on the days of death the sun does not seem to shine? Is it God's way of reminding us to take the time for mourning?

The day you went home baby I was a sun shiny day, but today when I picked up your remains from the funeral home, the skies were gray, and some raindrops had fell. It reminded me of the sadness of where I was at and why I was there. The color of the sky (gray) reminded me of one of your favorite colors, black being one of the others. The raindrops remind me that even though I am very sad, that you would want me to at least find a happy moment between the two of us as well. If that is the case, it is going to be a long time, and a wonderful journey. I miss you and long for your soft touch and your sweet kisses. I hope to see you soon, even if it starts with my dreams.

So the funny moment happens right after writing this note (it was actually hand written this morning).

So I am doing errands this morning and one of the first stops is to pick up Amy's remains from the funeral home. As they are finishing getting everything together, I step out to the car to hand write what I posted above. Well, I never EVER leave my keys in my hands or anywhere else (you probably know by now where this is going). I finished writing and needed to get back inside. I heard a slight tinkling sound as I opened the car door and I did as I usually do without thinking, I locked the door and then shut it. It took about 20 seconds for it to register in my brain...Tinkling sound, car door locked and shut, NOOOOOOOOO!!! Sure enough I looked helplessly in my car window and there lay the keys in the drivers seat locked securely.

Now when Amy meant for me to have some humorous things to remember, I did not think that meant starting now and working my way backwards. I was a little upset about the whole situation, but then I felt calm, looked up and said "I am laughing right there with you baby!!!" I could her her say, I told you you would forget some day. Thanks for making the day better baby, I miss you and love you LOTS!!!

I never thought it would hurt this bad

I am grieved and pressed down so far right now. I long for your touch and your lips pressing against mine. The enemy is trying to attack me with past thoughts, words, and deeds. I wish I could have spent every moment with you, embraced in your arms, kissing your lips, looking into your gorgeous eyes that were so beautiful, they were literally the windows to your soul.

As I look back now at the missed opportunities and the moments we should have had together, the sorrow cuts deeper all the more. I know you have forgiven me and now I need to be able to forgive myself. However, it is hard for you are not here for me to tell this to you in person. I am not quite sure how heaven and all works, but I pray that these words get to you. I look forward to the day of seeing you in all your beauty, completely healed, and embrace and kiss you once again. This time without mistake or regret, and for all eternity, the way promised each other, forever and always.

I miss you baby as do many others. Thank you for your prayers from above, and through Him and the promises that He has made to the saints, I find comfort and peace. I know one day I shall be able to thank Him face to face as you have done. Then I hope we can pick up where we left off. See you soon!!!

The first day of the week - A new beginning

This has always been one of my favorite (and best pictures I personally have every taken). It reminds me of our first date and it shows in her face how happy she was to finally have me (but we had not even discussed marriage yet). So I found it fitting since the first week of the pain of losing my best friend and soulmate has passed. It was a very rough weekend in more ways than one, but we won't get into that.

One of the biggest (and hardest things) I am grateful for today, is that we get to go back to worshiping with the saints at GCA, One of Amy's most favorite things to do was to listen to sermons, sermons jams, study God's word (ESPECIALLY with me (and I am so honored) and the girls in our devotional times). Amy, in case you did not know, loved the Lord our God, with ALL of her soul, might, strength. She was a witness and an earthly angel (I know I am being a little biased ;o) for doing God's work. Amy would share her witness and testimony boldly and proudly (sometimes got her into deep theological debates) on her sleeve and her heart.

Through the course of the four years that we were married, Amy knew with all of her health problems that she could not go as far as she did without the grace of God. There are times that she would cry and say that she could, and did not want to go on anymore. Yet, she knew the Sovereignty of God well, and knew if she was still here through all of this, there was a reason, and she would remain faithful, obedient, and run the race to the very end.

She could not have also made it this far without her church family, and Grace Christian Assembly (GCA) our home church has been such a blessing to our family before, during, and now after, to our family. We are proud and very honored to have such wonderful saints to have been in our lives. Although today will be difficult, I know that Amy is there with us in spirit and listening from the throne room above to her beloved Pastor Jim McClarty and enjoying the privilege of worship in the fullest presence of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.

Wishing you all comfort, peace, and the richest graces of God during these difficult times.

Grace & peace...

Shawn Campbell 

The First Time - Not the Way I Intended

You know when there's that time in life that you wanted to do something BIG, something special, but never got around to it? Well, this is my time, and I surely wish it was under different circumstances.

It all still seems so surreal. I (like many others I am sure) am catching myself at times thinking it is time to bring her home from the hospital. To others, it may be the next email, phone call, words of; compassion, love, encouragement, and hope. Today marks the one week anniversary of the passing of my beloved soulmate, Amy Krambeck Campbell.

This site is dedicated to the memories of her life; her God, her family, her friends, and all the lives that she touched while she was here, unbeknown to us that she was teaching in the ways of the Lord. She was a whole-hearted believer and follower of Christ through and through. She loved me like no one ever has, could, or will again.

Although it is quite painful right now as I can hardly see through the tears while I type. I would like to close this post with words of comfort for you all as well. Amy loved EVERYONE, was selfless, giving, kind hearted, warm, and loving beyond measure. She treated everyone fairly and helped whenever she could in any capacity. She lived and loved for her favorite ministries of her Intra-Cranial Hypertension (IH) and Bound for life (pro-life) groups. I know that one of the saints has gone home all too soon, but the Sovereignty of God finished the chapter and race with her, and ushered her gently and joyfully into her room in the mansion. She is still praying for us all, but now is doing it in heaven instead of trying to do it closer from here.

Thank you ALL for your friendship (and new friendships as well) and allowing Amy to be a part of y'alls lives. She still is and always will be a part of all of us. Yet, she wants us to move on and to live and love as she did, and not waste any precious moments of each breath that God allows us to have. As our dear Pastor Jim said during her eulogy, please, tell you stories. Tell your stories about her, tell your stories about your own lives and loved ones. Set aside the differences and the struggles of life, even just for a few moments and tell or write that special person who means the world to you. I know I just did, and will continue to do so the rest of my days.

Grace & peace...


Shawn M. Campbell (a.k.a DOC - the geek)